They Did WHAT? When Family Cross The Line

This is a post I’ve been looking forward to publishing. It’s one that everyone, I mean, ev-er-y-one can relate to. I’ve gasped and laughed at the responses I’ve received, about what peoples’ family have done to cross the lines. So many fantastic bloggers joined me on this one and a few have asked to join in anonymously with their juicy stories, so to not upset the apple cart.

Sometimes there are members of your family that go a little crazy once you’ve birthed your baby. Offer unsolicited opinions and parent your parenting. As a parent, it’s your right to go slightly crazy due to the sleepless nights and toddler tantrums, but your family and friends sometimes like to join in with their own odd antics.

Are you holding your drink of choice in your hand? You’ll need one to spit out as you scroll down the page…

Hannah from Hi Baby Blog

I get a lot of comments of the outlaws on how I raise L. The most common thing is that when they see something as a problem (how I choose to wean, the routine I implement, Luisa not being allowed processed meat, her clothes) they speak to Luisa about it not me. For example ‘oh hello baby girl wouldn’t it be so great if you could have a lovely sausage? Wouldn’t you like a nice Hot-Dog?’ Or ‘oh no pretty girl you’re wearing boys clothes – who did that to you?’

Kate from Refined Prose

My MIL asked me if she could sit outside the room while I was in labour so she could be the first to hold the baby, in front of me and my husband.

Anon

My MIL moved in for two weeks, uninvited, and I came close to breaking a plate over her head every day. She rearranged my kitchen and claimed she was there to ‘help’, when it was still me who cooked her meals, tidied up and cooed over my new baby. While she watched TV creating a huge bum print in our sofa.

Cat from Rock and Roll Pussycat

I could write a book. I no longer speak to my inlaws thank God. One thing sticks in my mind was my MIL trying to feed my 11 week old baby gravy from a teaspoon, not sure whether I’d deem it funny or irritating, probably just bloody idiotic

Emilie from Not Just Cake

My In Laws drive me crazy trying to get my son to pose for photos! They practically restrain him and repeat his name over and over again to get him to look up. Then if he cries they say “What’s wrong with him?”

Before we started weaning my FIL would says “Oh Is your mummy eating and youre not getting any? You must be starving!”… No he had an 8oz bottle an hour ago and doesn’t eat solids yet…

Maria from Suburban-Mum

My MIL (god bless her) recently gave my eldest son FIVE chunks of toblerone for his pudding. I almost had a heart attack when she told me!

She also started trying to explain where and what hell was once too before I had to step in and tell her that we don’t talk about things like that!

She’s lovely really and I wouldn’t know what we’d do without her helping us out twice a week but sometimes she just doesn’t think!

Anon

My parents have a clear favourite. Whether they realise it or not, they certainly make it obvious that the first-born is the apple of their eye. The first born is definitely not my child.

Laura from Max and Mummy

my MIL was waiting outside the room when I gave birth, stormed in when Max was born and went “I love you more than I love my own children”.

Dave from The DADventurer

My MIL constantly compares our kid to her other two grandkids – that’s fine, but L is 21 months old and the other two grandkids are 11 and 6! So when we say something like “Oh, L is happy to try any food”, she’ll always reply with “Oh yes, so are X and Y”. Well I’d bloody well hope so considering they’re so much older. Irritating!

Jessica from Beauties and the Bibs

I must be one of the only ones that has really supportive mother in law who is there for me no matter what as well as my parents . Although my mom cannot understand that things have changed since having both me and my brother.  When changing her nappy I don’t put cream on her every time unless she needs it . My mom insists that she needs it each nappy change. Which is really annoying I don’t want to put things on her precious skin unless I have to.

Holly from Little Pickles Mom

My MIL is definitely an odd one… She doesn’t seem to have grasped that times have moved on since she had her children. I think she thinks I must be stupid or something.

When I told her the MLU I’m planning to give birth in only keep you in for 6-8 hours afterwards should everything be normal, she laughed at me and said ‘don’t be silly, dear. They keep you in for at least a week.’
‘They don’t even keep you in for a week if you’ve had a c-section.’ I replied.

‘No, it’s two weeks for a c-section.’

Grrrrrrr. Yes, you’ve had three children and so far I haven’t birthed any but that DOESNT mean you know everything about modern day labour and the NHS. You may be very well versed in childbirth in the 80s but this is 2016, love. Things have moved on. And if you call me PLUM PUDDING or TUBBY one more time… I’ll unleash some serious preggo rage.

I know the passive aggressive ‘Mummy-knows-nothing, Nanny-knows-everything’ will only get worse when baby is here.

Tayla from Motherhood The Real Deal

My MIL literally started every sentence with the word “This is better” or “That is better” for the first year. I could have firmly poked her i the eye every time she uttered it!

Rachel at Parenthood Highs and Lows

My nan is a bloody nightmare. Two days after giving birth she told me I was still too fat. She told me feeding on demand would spoil them, told me off for breastfeeding in a restaurant because there was an older gentlemen on the next table. She was horrified that I am going away for an entire weekend to Britmums because dads shouldn’t look after their children at night (WTAF?) and that’s just the ones I can think of off the top of my head. However, she spoils my three rotten. My mum and mother in law are brilliant though.

Becky

When my little girl was about 2, I was chatting to my friend about how meal times were a nightmare as she was so fussy. My friend, who wasn’t a mum yet at the time says “Have you taken her to be wormed yet? If not, that could be why?” She’s now a mum and I really hope she doesn’t take her baby to the doctors to be wormed.

Hannah from Hannah Spannah

Before she was my MIL, the first time they came to eat at my house that my ex husband moved into, was for a Bbq. They brought their own meat. Not enough to share, just two burgers and two sausages. She wouldn’t eat any foreign food such as my pasta salad, rice etc so I made jacket potatoes and some roasted veg but she ate nothing but her own meat. FIL at least ate some of the food I prepared. She answered all the mr and Mrs questions that I was being asked on my hen do as ‘she knew her son’. When I thanked her for coming and it had been so nice, she told me I was lying. (I was but do you really say that as a polite response to a thanks for coming?!!). My ex mother in law told me ‘breastfeeding was disgusting’ and my ex father in law told me not to feed for too long or I’ll ruin my boobs. She constantly told me to ‘just be done with it and give him a bottle’. They didn’t buy my son a single gift from the day he was born to the day my ex husband left at 7 months. It’s not about the gifts I just found it weird that they didn’t want to buy something their only grandchild within 250 miles. That they didn’t spot something in a shop and think they’d buy it just because. Not even a vest or a bib let alone a toy.

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17 Comments

  1. May 25, 2016 / 7:03 am

    Loved, loved, loved this post and I agree, this is something that would resonate with pretty much everyone. There’s been so many times over the last 3 years where I’ve had to bite my tongue (not easy for me) and just rise above it. But then there’s also been times when I’ve not been so dignified and a row has ensued. Oooops! #bloggerclubuk

    • firstooth
      May 27, 2016 / 11:24 am

      Biting your tongue is sometimes the best way. Especially when they’re not your parents! It can be hard though depending on the situation

  2. May 25, 2016 / 7:03 am

    Wow some of these are craaaazzzy!!! I’m lucky as my MIL hasn’t done anything too bad. The worst thing is comparisons to my hubby and bro in law I guess. How they were never ill or hubby loved his cot until he was 3 (WTF – why not get him in a bed?) and they never seemed to do anything wrong!!!! Great post and thanks for sharing with #bestandworst x

    • firstooth
      May 27, 2016 / 11:23 am

      This comparisons are grating but you’re lucky, mine is lovely too x

  3. May 25, 2016 / 7:14 am

    Is getting them wormed a recognised cure for fussy eating? I might try that! Ha! 😀
    x Alice
    #bestandworst

    • firstooth
      May 27, 2016 / 11:22 am

      Haha!nooooo!

  4. Laughing Mum
    May 25, 2016 / 9:26 am

    haha! its seem MIL are the worst offenders here lol – I could actually add to that with tales of my own annoying MIL, but what annoys me the most is that MY mum still insists on doing everything for my kids, who are preteen and teen! I actually witnessed the teen putting her foot on my mums knee so my mum could tie her shoe lace!!! I was like WTF?! and my mum just said, “it’s fine, I don’t mind doing it…” but when I tried to explain that this is not cool, and partly to blame for them not doing anything at home, she just said “yes, well, thats YOUR problem, not mine” lol – she’s the best nan ever, but I constantly find myself saying “mum… stop!”

    • firstooth
      May 27, 2016 / 11:21 am

      That did make me laugh!! Yes MIL seem to be the worst offenders but maybe we’re less lenient on them, who knows! Gosh your mum sounds absolutely lovely bless her but I’d be the same as you! X

  5. Lisa | Thirtysomething Belle
    May 25, 2016 / 3:43 pm

    This made me laugh yet sad, all at the same time. I no longer speak to my MIL but can relate so so many of these stories. One ‘gem’ was when my MIL gave my 3 week old daughter CUSTARD, resulting in a hospital stay and long tern issues. Her defence to the CONSULTANT?: “Oh you’re all over – reacting. I did it with my kids are they’re fine” *eye roll*

    • firstooth
      May 27, 2016 / 11:19 am

      Oh God! I’m not surprised you have drifted away from her that’s crazy. It’s sad to hear though, it’s such a shame when interference leads to a family breakdown. But us mamas mean business and when it comes to our children we all have strong boundaries which need to be respected. Things are different now and I think some parents aren’t moving with the times xx

  6. The Tale of Mummyhood
    May 25, 2016 / 9:16 pm

    ‘Breaking a plate over her head’ literally made me laugh out loud! This is a great post, family can sometimes be the worst at sticking their two penneth in when we need support!

    #BloggerClubUK

    • firstooth
      May 27, 2016 / 11:16 am

      I know! Some of them are crackers aren’t they!

  7. May 28, 2016 / 2:37 pm

    I couldn’t possibly comment on my in-laws!! #bestandworst

  8. May 28, 2016 / 9:13 pm

    Oh my word, this was so entertaining! The things people do and say sometimes is just shocking! x #BloggerClubUK

    • firstooth
      May 29, 2016 / 12:12 pm

      Shocking and hilarious! X

  9. May 30, 2016 / 9:39 am

    Yes… unsolicited advice happens all of the time! It can be really hard to take it on board when it really has nothing to do with the way you want to parent. The only thing I can say in defense of all of these MIL’s is that I wouldn’t be surprised if I turn out like that one day. I imagine it’d be hard to watch someone parent your grandchildren all wrong – you’d have to say something! LOL Thanks so much for linking up with us at #BloggerClubUK x

  10. May 30, 2016 / 10:47 am

    Some of these are SO funny! What is it with parents? My dad told me about a million times Ellis should be potty trained by now. He just wasn’t ready so I wasn’t going to put myself through the stress of cleaning up accidents all day long. If he says the same about Kinley, I may just have to get him to babysit for a fortnight and he can deal with the house stinking of wee! #bloggerbclubuk

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